Saturday, August 6, 2011

Election Limbo Day 42: The Mrs. Justin Timberlake Edition

This hot man is also not
Principal Chief of CN
As we discussed yesterday, Bill John Baker sent out a news release yesterday with some very interesting information.  First, he accused the council of holding an illegal meeting, and said the council’s attorney Todd Hembree said it was illegal.  Hembree was at the meeting, though, and according to our sources, never said a word about it being illegal.  Also, the meeting was cancelled for lack of a quorum, though that’s never stopped Baker: in the 90s he voted to impeach the whole Supreme Court in an illegal meeting without a quorum.

But to us, it’s not even the most interesting thing about his news release from yesterday.

To us, the most interesting thing is right there at the top.  Some of our eagle-eyed readers already spotted it.  Baker’s letterhead says “Bill John Baker Cherokee Nation Principal Chief.” 


It’s hard to keep track of how many levels that this is NOT the Cherokee Truth.  First and foremost, no one has been elected chief in 2011.  Smith was certified a winner once, Baker was certified a winner based on an unreliable recount that the court threw out, Smith won an excrutiatingly long hand recount in which the court and both candidates participated and saw every ballot be counted.  But Baker didn’t win.  Neither did Smith, according to the Supreme Court. Even though Smith had the most votes, the court gave Baker a do-over, which will happen on September 24, 2011-- just seven weeks from today.

The truth is, there are absolutely no factual circumstances under which Bill John Baker is Principal Chief of the Cherokee Nation right now. Chief Smith’s term to which he was elected hasn't even expired yet.  But, Baker sent out a news release proclaiming the title of Principal Chief anyway. 

Maybe he likes the way it looks when he sees it in writing, like those middle school girls who write Mrs. Justin Timberlake in their notebooks or whatever.  Or maybe he is trying a Jedi mind trick, though he should know that only works on the feeble-minded, and it’s apparent that he has not completed his training.   Or maybe he’s just got a whole bunch of business cards burning a hole in his pocket that he can’t wait to use.

"This not the Chief you're looking for..."
Regardless, we just want to clarify for everyone that no matter what Bill John Baker might send you via email, he is NOT principal chief of the Cherokee Nation.  Maybe he will be someday, but until then, he should probably sign all his correspondence as District 1 Tribal Councilor, since that is a post to which he has actually been elected.

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